I am still breathing....

So life lately has thrown us for a HUGE loop. The one thing I always swore was the one thing that would be able to break me, my faith, my sanity, my heart, has happened. Amazing I am still breathing. It has been a REALLY long time since any serious trials have been thrown my way. My liver running amuck with a mind of it's own always sits on the back burner. There are the financial difficulties that constantly loom with this economy. Just fear that everything I know and love could in the blink of an cease to exist. These, for me, have always been just a pin prick compared to how broken I thought I would be if I lost the one thing that would make me question my FAITH and my BELIEF in my Father's plan for me. It has happened and though "WHY!!!!!!" has kept pounding in my head, and night after night I have gone with out sleep, and knot after knot keeps forming in my stomach, I am still alive and I have to let you know the only thing that has kept me hanging on is a quiet prayer, or thought of my heart, love from a husband and child, and the soft arms that have silently enveloped me(only when I am still enough to recognize their presence) have kept me alive. Kept me able to survive the crumbling or at least what felt like the crumbling of my world. I can say with full conviction of heart, Satan, World, Whatever adversary lies out there, BRING IT ON!!!! I am not broken, I am still breathing, and it is only by sweet never ending grace that I can say My Father lives. My Savior lives. I live and I am happy,